Laugh Out Loud: Hilarious Quotes for Every Occasion - Page 12
Brighten your day with a selection of humorous and funny quotes. Laugh out loud with witty and amusing insights. Page 12 provides more funny quotes.
There's nothing I dislike more than being in a photo shoot where they say, 'Be yourself.' That's not why I became an actress. That's what I find so funny: that you become an actor, and all of a sudden, everyone wants to know about you. But I didn't become an actor so I could show you me.Collection: Funny
Comedy is so subjective. You could be in a room with 400 people laughing at a joke and you could just not think it's funny. You're just sitting there like, 'Am I in the twilight zone? Why is everyone laughing?' It's such a personal thing. People have such a personal visceral response to comedy.Collection: Funny
What I like best is a book that's at least funny once in a while. What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.Collection: Funny
I remember listening to the radio as a kid and finding that the songs always made me feel more peaceful. Funny, but the more hurtin' the music was, the better it made me feel. I think of that now when I write my songs. I may not be feelin' the blues myself, but I'm writing them for other people who have a hard life.Collection: Funny
'Wonder Showzen' is one of my favorite shows of all time. When I first saw it, I thought it was so funny and new and original and edgy and insane and subversive. I didn't know comedy could do that. It redefined what I thought you could do with a TV show.Collection: Funny
Often, joking for me is a way of diffusing the awkwardness of a situation, so it's kind of exhilarating to be a part of projects where there's nothing funny or lighthearted.Collection: Funny
I was just a goofy little funny kid, who was always getting sent to the principal. It wasn't serious because I was smart. I wasn't like a true troublemaker, just rambunctious - like, talkative and trying to be funny. That was me in middle-school.Collection: Funny
I believe in choosing your words very carefully. It's funny: I'll get comments like, 'Oh I love you. You don't care; you have no filter.' On the contrary, I absolutely have a filter, because I understand decorum, and my objective is not to upset people.Collection: Funny
You shouldn't get too close to the truth, because then maybe you stop being funny.Collection: Funny
Honestly, I am a very funny person, and I love making others laugh.Collection: Funny
A reputation takes years and years and years to build, and it takes one press of a button to ruin it. Don't let that happen to you. You've done so much work; you've put in so much effort. Don't let one moment ruin your entire life because you wanted to be funny or you were mad or because you had a mood.Collection: Funny
Confidence is a funny thing, and sometimes that's all you need is just that little bit to elevate you to the next level.Collection: Funny
I'm blonde and tanned and normal-sized! I'm sweet, shy, funny, have a big heart and I'm nice - and I like to eat.Collection: Funny
Naked dudes are inherently funny.Collection: Funny
It's funny what a few no-hitters do for a body.Collection: Funny
Everyone has at least one story, and each of us is funny if we admit it. You have to admit you're the funniest person you've ever heard of.Collection: Funny
If you could cross a lion and a monkey, that's what I'd be, because monkeys are funny and lions are strong.Collection: Funny
What's funny about Jesus' Son is that I never even wrote that book, I just wrote it down. I would tell these stories and people would say, You should write these things down.Collection: Funny
I find, when you're an optimist, life has a funny way of looking after you.Collection: Funny
If you're funny, if there's something that makes you laugh, then every day's going to be okay.Collection: Funny
I like to think my accent isn't strong enough, but it's funny: I get people coming up to me in America and saying I sound like Mel B. She's from Leeds. They just hear a British accent and probably can't quite work it out.Collection: Funny
A funny thing happens in real estate. When it comes back, it comes back up like gangbusters.Collection: Funny
I wouldn't have been born if my parents had stayed in China. Which is kind of funny. But it also just kind of fills me with this existential dread.Collection: Funny
It's a funny kind of month, October. For the really keen cricket fan, it's when you discover that your wife left you in May.Collection: Funny
I think maybe one reason why ventriloquists are looked down on is because it's very difficult to be funny. I think what happens is that people get a dummy, they learn the technique of ventriloquism, they memorize the script, they think they're in show business.Collection: Funny
I was in love with Michael Keaton. He was very funny.Collection: Funny
I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.Collection: Funny
Funny enough, you know who I used to really like in Lion King? It was Scar.Collection: Funny
When I'm being funny, I try not to offend. I don't think much of what I've done has been in really ghastly taste. I don't think I have embarrassed many people or distressed them.Collection: Funny
Jon Stewart hires people that he thinks are funny. That's it. That's the only requirement.Collection: Funny
I'm mourning with the rest of the world for the talented, gorgeous, funny, intelligent John Forsythe but my heart is broken for the loss of my dear, dear friend and neighbor. I will miss him terribly.Collection: Funny
Sometimes I'm really funny, sometimes I'm quiet, sometimes I'm shy, but I'm constantly changing.Collection: Funny
I got to draw monsters, robots and write funny stories. I loved doing that stuff and working with the actors. But it got to be less and less that stuff and more about trying to be everywhere and not being able to do one thing very enjoyably.Collection: Funny
Isn't it funny how babies laugh a lot? I read a toddler, a young child laughs 300 times a day. The average adult laughs, like, four times a day. God put it in them. He put the laugh in us, but I think sometimes we let life get us down, you know, have bad breaks, and we lose our breaks.Collection: Funny
My first film was a super-hit. It made the producer earn a lot of money and gave me a lot of fame. The funny part is that I acted in Tum Bin' as a project for which I was paid a stipend and not the money that comes to the star of a very popular film.Collection: Funny
It's funny because when you're a Welshman living in England, you always get the mickey taken out of you for being Welsh, and then when you go to Wales with an English accent because you were born in Bristol and grew up in Birmingham, they say you're English. You can never win.Collection: Funny
It's so funny how it's impossible for an American actor to play an English part or an Australian part. But by all means, come and bastardize our accent as much as you want.Collection: Funny
There are so many funny women in the world, and there has been for so many years, so I'll be happy when people can just move on from that, and things can just be 'comedies' and not 'female' or 'male,' and everyone gets an equal opportunity.Collection: Funny
It's interesting - I always thought when I was doing more melodramatic stuff like 'Everwood' that the directors were constantly reeling me in and stopping me from being funny.Collection: Funny
I've never directed before, so I need to make sure that people know that I can. The movie that I've written, 'The Sophisticates,' is a... small ensemble comedy and I hope it's charming and funny.Collection: Funny
I show them the funny part, the silly part, the laughing part, the crazy part and then the really deep, deep part where I'm talking from my heart to these people. Because I've been through everything they've been through.Collection: Funny
It's funny, I often think about how, if we were all placed in an apocalyptic situation, you'd realize quickly how stupid, petty things just don't matter anymore. Who you love is who you love, and it doesn't matter.Collection: Funny
The shooting of the guns, that was kind of funny, because rolling a cigarette and shooting a gun aren't like normal things for a 13-year old girl!Collection: Funny
Nine out of 10 times these guys will hit it-they'll be on something incredibly funny, but one out of 10, two out of 10, they'll fall flat on their faces. That's what makes them great actors: they take those chances, they don't play it safe.Collection: Funny
I'm not on all the time. I like to have fun and be funny, but I'm much more of a thinker.Collection: Funny
The show is definitely not just about weight-loss physically. It's more about finding yourself. It's really funny because I realized at one of our table reads that 'Huge' was really about the weight that we carry around mentally.Collection: Funny
It's funny: there's this idea where Kenny is only good because he can do what he wants, and he gets time. Well, everyone else through those doors had had time and opportunity. Why didn't they do anything special?Collection: Funny
It's funny: most people who recognize me on the subway and stuff - it's much more they think of me as a funny guy. I get much more of people telling me how much I make them laugh, actually. Which is nice.Collection: Funny
You put funny people in funny costumes and paint them green and we could talk about anything we wanted to, because that was the only thing that fascinated Gene about this particular genre.Collection: Funny