Zach Braff
I tried it a few times but didn't see the point. I'm Zach Braff. What the fudge do I need a team for besides holding me back and sucking? If I wanted that, I'd just walk on the set of 'Scrubs'.Collection: Team
People are always saying bad things about them, but really they think they're just trying to clean up our planet. I'm not saying it's right but, you know, we could all benefit from following that example.Collection: Thinking
I'm always being told by directors that I add chemistry to scenes, so I mean how difficult could it be?Collection: Mean
Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.Collection: Alright
When you're the director and the writer, you never have to remember your lines, and there's no one to call you on it. On Garden State I did different lines on every take, just making crap up. And it was great each time.Collection: Garden
If I wasn't an actor? Hmm, I'd probably be a serial killer. I'm just so damn likeable, no one would ever suspect me.Collection: Serial Killer
She can't say no if she's unconscious.Collection: Unconscious
I don't think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.Collection: Thinking
In April 1975 I was born and the Vietnam War ended. I could not let any American die in war before seeing an episode of Scrubs.Collection: War
I've always tried to learn from the greats: Orson Welles, Humphrey Bogart, Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus... it's just that there's this tremendous pressure to correct all the things they got wrong.Collection: Jesus
I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.Collection: Book
It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?Collection: Example
I mean, I understand that Scrubs was my big break, but sooner or later you have to move on. I've already directed a movie, which received very good reviews, so it just seems much more important to me now. I feel that in order to better foster my creativity as an actor and director at this point, I need to be surrounded by other talented, artistic individuals, instead of just goofy comedians.Collection: Moving
Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than meCollection: People
I've always preferred Marvel over DC. I just relate to their characters better. I mean look at Wolverine, at first he was just a bit player in an ensemble cast. Now he's the only reason people read X-Men. Just like me and Scrubs.Collection: Character
If Democrats want to start winning elections in this country, they're going to have to start connecting with voters as well as I connect with my fans.Collection: Country
I really do take more vacations than the president. You can quote me on that.Collection: Vacation
I'm not saying eating babies should be legal, but when they're so delicious, what's the harm in it? I don't know what tastes better, their innocence or their gooey rib butter.Collection: Baby
Its not that I'm in love with myself, I'm just trying to pick up everyone else's slack.Collection: Trying
I don't belive Oprah's sexual abuse stories, I mean who would take a black girl when there are plenty of white?Collection: Girl
If a benevolent God exists, so does reincarnation. He wouldn't send me here just once.Collection: Doe
It's... it's such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I'll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy.Collection: Girl
If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.Collection: War
Lots of people were giving me flak when I made the deal to do the very last season of Scrubs for $350,000 an episode. When really I'm the one that's being cheated, because the writer's strike is keeping me from all the money that I could be making. I need to eat, too.Collection: People
That Hugh Laurie show is nothing but Scrubs fan fiction.Collection: Fans
Incognito mode? What do they have to hide? Zach Braff doesn't have anything to hide - Zach Braff lays it all out there for everybody to see. That is Zach Braff's secret to Zach Braff's success.Collection: Secret
It's a really fun hobby to set imagery to music, and finding the right songs for that. Your favorite song in the world might not work at all... for one reason or another.Collection: Song
You always see actors complaining about being typecast and ruining their career. Really, I don't see the point in complaining. If the only role you can play well is a black dude, you're never going to get ahead in this town, and you should just accept it.Collection: Play
Is 'Garden State' the next 'Citizen Kane'? Of course not. I'd like to think we aimed a little higher than that, frankly.Collection: Garden
Have I ever had sex with a hooker? I'd like to answer that question with a question of my own. Can just anyone look up police records?Collection: Sex
A kid came up to me the other day and said, 'Hey, you're the guy on Scrubs!' Kid, I am Scrubs, and don't you forget it.Collection: Kids
A lot of people consider 9/11 to be a tragedy, and in some ways it is, but I think there's also opportunity for a lot of humor there.Collection: Opportunity
It's kind of ironic that my character is a doctor who acts very gay with his best friend. I don't see how gays could ever be doctors, they spend too much time whining about everything. Just get off your soapbox and go back to designing floral arrangements.Collection: Character
It's just Gods way of getting babies to heaven faster!Collection: Baby
Yea, I've got a dream too. It involves time-travel and a rifle.Collection: Dream
I don't want to be one of those guys, but Snape DOES kill Dumbledore.Collection: Guy
Well I can understand why men want it to be legal. Obviously they're all hoping they might get to marry me someday. I hate to burst their bubble, but they should just give it up now. Zach Braff doesn't sway that way, you know?Collection: Hate
I certainly do not consider myself the next Jesus. I'd say he was more of a precursor to Zach Braff.Collection: Jesus
Everyday I question myself. I look in the mirror, or read one of my scripts, or I reflect on my acting and I say to myself 'that was good...but was it Zach Braff good?' Lets just say things have been looking pretty Zach Braff so far.Collection: Mirrors
In theater or movies you see either 'I'm religious' or 'I'm an atheist.' I've never seen too much discussion of 'I believe there's a higher power but I'm hesitant to reach out to him because I don't know if I'm worthy of his attention.Collection: Religious
You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.Collection: Jesus
My co-stars aren't bad actors, but they're no Zach Braff.Collection: Stars
I'm not gay, but I'm still the kind of guy where, even though you have no chance, they still want to hang around me so you can get a good mental image and jerk off to me later.Collection: Gay
Without me, Scrubs would be worse than the holocaust. But with me in it, it's turned into the lolocaust.Collection: Holocaust
I never really understood all the hype, until I got one of my own.Collection: Hype
It's funny when I read the tabloids and they're reporting on only a fraction of the life I'm leading.Collection: Tabloids
People always say The God Father is the #1 movie of all time. But ask yourself, did you see Zach Braff in it....No you didn't. So then by default it goes to Garden State..and if youwatch two episodes of scrubs back to back that counts as the #2.Collection: Father
People are always going to find fault with anything you do, any process that you're a part of. The creative process means taking risks, I've taken risks and I've made mistakes, but the bottom line is, could anyone else have done any better ? I have to believe that what I created was worthwhile.Collection: Mistake
In my opinion, one of the biggest drawbacks about Sergio Leone films are the scores composed by Ennio Morricone. If [Leone] were as talented as I am, he would have made mixtapes for his movies instead of letting some schmuck write the soundtracks for him. But then if he were as talented as I am, he'd be Zach Braff. And have his own Grammy.Collection: Writing