Noel Coward
Any part of the piggy Is quite all right with me Ham from Westphalia, ham from Parma Ham as lean as the Dalai Lama Ham from Virginia, ham from York, Trotters Sausages, hot roast pork. Crackling crisp for my teeth to grind on Bacon with or without the rind on Though humanitarian I'm not a vegetarian. I'm neither crank nor prude nor prig And though it may sound infra dig Any part of the darling pig Is perfectly fine with me.Collection: Food
It is not the eyes of others that I am wary of, but my own.Collection: Eye
There are bad times just around the corner, There are dark clouds travelling through the sky, And it's no good whining, About a silver lining, For we know from experience they won't roll by...Collection: Dark
You always ought to have tom cats arranged, you know - it makes 'em more companionable.Collection: Cat
The pleasures that once were heaven look silly at sixty-seven.Collection: Silly
Here ends the story of a ship, but there will always be other ships, for we are an island race. Through all our centuries, the sea has ruled our destiny. There will always be other ships and men to sail in them. It is these men, in peace or war, to whom we owe so much. Above all victories, beyond all loss, in spite of changing values in a changing world, they give to us, their countrymen, eternal and indomitable pride.Collection: War
Christopher Marlowe or Francis Bacon The author of Lear remains unshaken Willie Herbert or Mary Fitton What does it matter? The Sonnets were written.Collection: Doe
Exercise is the most awful illusion. The secret is a lot of aspirin and marrons glaces.Collection: Exercise
I don't think pornography is harmful, but it is terribly, terribly boring.Collection: Thinking
A bloody good thing, but too late.Collection: Government
It's no good pacing up and down. It won't make the plane arrive any faster. Just sit down and accept that we're delayed. You're just making a fool of yourself.Collection: Down And
Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the mid-day sun.Collection: Dog
Good heavens, television is something you appear on; you don't watch.Collection: Art
If by any chance a playwright wishes to express a political opinion or a moral opinion or a philosophy, he must be a good enough craftsman to do it with so much spice of entertainment in it that the public get the message without being aware of it.Collection: Philosophy
To know you are among people whom you love, and who love you – that has made all the successes wonderful, much more wonderful than they'd have been anyway.Collection: Love You
I also avoid green vegetables. They're grossly overrated.Collection: Vegetables
I want a horse and plough, Chickens too, Just one cow, With a wistful moo.Collection: Country
It's like this, dear boy, the one in front is blind and the kind one behind is pushing him.Collection: Funny
Acting is not a state of being ... but a state of appearing to be. You can't be eight times a week without going stark staring mad. You've got to be in control.Collection: Eight
She had much in common with Hitler, only no mustache.Collection: Sarcastic
I don't much care for Hollywood, I'd rather have a nice cup of cocoa.Collection: Nice
I have always been very fond of them (drama critics) . . . I think it is so frightfully clever of them to go night after night to the theatre and know so little about it.Collection: Funny
You ask my advice about acting? Speak clearly, don't bump into the furniture and if you must have motivation, think of your pay packet on Friday.Collection: Funny
Goodnight, my darlings, I'll see you tomorrow.Collection: Dying
I'm an enormously talented man, and there's no use pretending that I'm not.Collection: Men
Dear 338171 (May I call you 338?)Collection: Funny
AMANDA: I think very few people are completely normal really, deep down in their private lives.Collection: Thinking
He must have been an incredibly good shot.Collection: Intellectual
Running is the classical road to self-consciousn ess, self-awareness and self-reliance. Independence is the outstanding characteristic of a runner. He learns the harsh reality of his physical and spiritual limitations when he runs. He learns that personal commitment, sacrifice and determination are his only means to betterment. Runners get promoted only through self-conquest.Collection: Running
You kissed me because you were awfully nice and I was awfully nice and we both liked kissing very much. It was inevitable.Collection: Nice
Labour leaders lead us all, though we know they bleed us all. Cheer our new Decline and Fall, Gibbon might have dreamed it all.Collection: Cheer
It's no use to go and take courses in playwriting any more than it's much use taking courses in acting. Better play to a bad matinée in Hull, it will teach you much more than a year of careful instruction.Collection: Thinking
Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the mid-day sun; The Japanese don't care to, the Chinese wouldn't dare to; Hindus and Argentines sleep firmly from twelve to one, But Englishmen detest a siesta.Collection: Dog
I'm over-educated in the things I shouldn't have known at all.Collection: Educated
I can take any amount of criticism, as long as it is unqualified praise.Collection: Long
There isn't a particle of you that I don't know, remember, and want.Collection: Friendship
Of course, the age-old tradition that a star must appear even if he or she is practically dying is an excellent one, but it can be carried too far. I one played a performance of The Knight of the Burning Pestle with a temperature of 103 and gave sixteen members of the company mumps, thereby closing the play and throwing everybody out of work. There may be a moral lurking somewhere in this, but I cannot for the life of me discover what it is.Collection: Stars
I never cared who scored the goal, or which side won the silver cup. I never learned to bat or bowl; but I heard the curtain going up.Collection: Wisdom
Sunburn is very becoming - but only when it is even - one must be careful not to look like a mixed grill.Collection: Caring
Bed is the perfect climate.Collection: Perfect
The Stately Homes of England, How beautiful they stand, To prove the Upper Classes, Have still the Upper Hand.Collection: Funny
In the first act, you get the audience's attention - once you have it, they will repay you in the second. Play through the laughs if you have to. It will only make the audience believe there are so many of them that they missed a few.Collection: Believe
How about slipping out of those wet things and into a dry Martini?Collection: Food
My life really has been one long extravaganza.Collection: Long
Las Vegas: It was not cafe society, it was Nescafe societyCollection: Vegas
Wouldn't it be dreadful to live in a country where they didn't have tea?Collection: Country
At twelve noon, The natives swoon And no further work is doneBut mad dogs and Englishmen, Go out in the midday sun.Collection: Dog