Henry Cloud
We know from research that growth is actually contagious, so if you want to reach your goals, you've got to get around people that are going in the same direction you want to be going, and you will catch the success.Collection: Success
People tend to look at dating sort of like a safari - like they're trying to land the trophy.Collection: Dating
In a very real way, ownership is the essence of leadership. When you are 'ridiculously in charge,' then you own whatever happens in a company, school, et cetera.Collection: Leadership
What happens with a lot of leaders is that their leadership style is like ADD; they are all over the place with different ideas. They could be driving one idea forward but then move on to something else too soon.Collection: Leadership
I fell in love with the topic of leadership. For three decades, that has been a major focus of my hands-on work: listening to and working with leaders, their teams and their organizations.Collection: Leadership
When you encourage someone, it literally changes their brain chemistry to be able to perform... sends fuel to the brain.Collection: Brain
A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word 'no.' Love respects 'no,' control does not.Collection: Doe
We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.Collection: Inspirational
Whatever's happening today, remember it is only ONE SCENE in a long movie. Don't treat it like it's the whole story. Keep writing the story.Collection: Writing
Getting to the next level always requires ending something, leaving it behind, and moving on. Growth demands that we move on. Without the ability to end things, people stay stuck, never becoming who they are meant to be, never accomplishing all that their talents and abilities should afford them.Collection: Moving
When we begin to set boundaries with people we love, a really hard thing happens: they hurt. They may feel a hole where you used to plug up their aloneness, their disorganization, or their financial irresponsibility. Whatever it is, they will feel a loss. If you love them, this will be difficult for you to watch. But, when you are dealing with someone who is hurting, remember that your boundaries are both necessary for you and helpful for them. If you have been enabling them to be irresponsible, your limit setting may nudge them toward responsibility.Collection: Hurt
The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.Collection: Trying
You will not grow without attempting to do things you are unable to do.Collection: Attempting
Boundaries are basically about providing structure, and structure is essential in building anything that thrives.Collection: Essentials
There is a difference between solitude and isolation. One is connected and one isn't. Solitude replenishes, isolation diminishes.Collection: Differences
The mature person meets the demands of life, while the immature person demands that life meet her demands.Collection: Mature Person
In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.Collection: Two
The human heart will seek to be known, understood, and connected with above all else. If you do not connect, the ones you care about will find someone who will.Collection: Heart
Everything has seasons, and we have to be able to recognize when something's time has passed and be able to move into the next season. Everything that is alive requires pruning as well, which is a great metaphor for endings.Collection: Moving
Marriage is not slavery. It is based on a love relationship deeply rooted in freedom. Each partner is free from the other and therefore free to love the other. Where there is control, or perception of control, there is not love. Love only exists where there is freedom.Collection: Love
Encourage literally came from "in courage." The courage is put "into" you from outside. Our character and abilities grow through internalizing from others what we do not possess in ourselves.Collection: Character
For someone's character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.Collection: Children
We all make mistakes, but the people who thrive from their mistakes are the successful ones.Collection: Success
When we can't hold back, or set boundaries, on what comes from our lips, our words are in charge-not us. But we are still responsible for those words. Our words do not come from somewhere outside of us, as if we were a ventriloquist's dummy. They are the product of our hearts. Our saying, "I didn't mean that," is probably better translated, "I didn't want you to know I thought that about you." We need to take responsibility for our words. "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken" (Matt. 12:36).Collection: Mean
Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.Collection: Pain
If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.Collection: People
When truth presents itself, the wise person see the light, takes it in, and makes adjustments. The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.Collection: Wise
The Bible is clear about two principles: (1) We always need to forgive, but (2) we don’t always achieve reconciliation. Forgiveness is something that we do in our hearts; we release someone from a debt that they owe us. We write off the person’s debt, and she no longer owes us. We no longer condemn her. She is clean. Only one party is needed for forgiveness: me. The person who owes me a debt does not have to ask my forgiveness. It is a work of grace in my heart.Collection: Party
Leadership is not taken, it is given. People give leadership to those that they trust. They allow people that they trust to have influence over their lives.Collection: Taken
Because dating is a human exercise, it can be a tightrope fraught with danger. You will be dating imperfect people, and some of them are more imperfect than others. In addition, you are not perfect either, so that complicates the picture.Collection: Exercise
If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you 'do' boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.Collection: Kids
Just as we leave the effects of our work behind in results, we leave the effects of our interactions with people in their hearts, minds, and souls.Collection: Heart
When a person travels through a few years with an organization, or with a partnership, or any other kind of working association, he leaves a 'wake' behind in these two areas, task and relationship: what did he accomplish and how did he deal with people?Collection: Two
Who a person is will ultimately determine if their brains, talents, competencies, energy, effort, deal-making abilities, and opportunities will succeed.Collection: Opportunity
In a very real way, ownership is the essence of leadership. When you are ridiculously in charge, then you own whatever happens in a company, school, et cetera.Collection: Real
The business of church is ultimately people. You're trying to heal people, grow people, teach people, and mend people. And when leaders spend all of their time helping and growing other people, they ignore their own growth.Collection: People
That is why success and fruitfulness depend as much upon focusing on the "who" you are as much as the "what" of the work you do. Invest in your character, and it will give you the returns that you are looking for by only investing in the work itself. You can't do the latter without the former.Collection: Character
Dating is a give and take. If you only see it as "Taking," you are not getting it.Collection: Giving
Leave your pride, ego, and narcissism somewhere else. Reactions from those parts of you will reinforce your children's most primitive fears.Collection: Children
Dating is a place to practice how to relate to other people.Collection: Practice
It’s scary to realize that the only thing holding our friends to us isn’t our performance, or our lovability, or their guilt, or their obligation. The only thing that will keep them calling, spending time with us, and putting up with us is love. And that’s the one thing we can’t control.Collection: Scary
If you are building a culture where honest expectations are communicated and peer accountability is the norm, then the group will address poor performance and attitudes.Collection: Attitude
Oftentimes, churches are started by an entrepreneurial church plant visionary whom everybody follows, but he's not following anybody. Even though he's "accountable to a board," he's really not. Authority's a good thing, and if it's not forced upon you as a leader, then I suggest, strongly, that you go buy some.Collection: Leader
Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is.Collection: Games
The idea of submission is never meant to allow someone to overstep another's boundaries. Submission only has meaning in the context of boundaries, for boundaries promote self-control and freedom. If a wife is not free and in control of herself, she is not submitting anyway. She is a slave subject to a slave driver, and she is out of the will of God.Collection: Self
You aren't alive if you aren't in need.Collection: Needs
Dating should be a part of your life, not your life a part of dating. There is more to life than finding a date.Collection: Dating
Independence is not an option for us. Remember, God existed without us.Collection: Independence
I'm not an expert in the sociological realities of all the pastors in the world, but I would say that there are some very, very positive things about the state of integrity in church leaders.Collection: Integrity