Laugh Out Loud: Hilarious Quotes for Every Occasion - Page 4

Brighten your day with a selection of humorous and funny quotes. Laugh out loud with witty and amusing insights. Page 4 provides more funny quotes.

Image of Lewis Black
Democrats are dumb and Republicans are stupid, but the difference between dumb and stupid is dumb isn't funny. Dumb is when you say something and the whole room goes, 'What did he say?'
- Lewis Black
Collection: Funny
Image of David Ogilvy
The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.
- David Ogilvy
Collection: Funny
Image of Michael Schumacher
You win a race, the next race it's a question mark. Are you still the best or not? That's what is funny. But that's what is interesting. And that's what is challenging. You have to prove yourself every time.
- Michael Schumacher
Collection: Funny
Image of Theo Von
They're just jokes, people. They can't all be funny.
- Theo Von
Collection: Funny
Image of Lee Trevino
Only bad golfers are lucky. They're the ones bouncing balls off trees, curbs, turtles and cars. Good golfers have bad luck. When you hit the ball straight, a funny bounce is bound to be unlucky.
- Lee Trevino
Collection: Funny
Image of Karan Patel
I am blessed with a funny gene that makes me enjoy life.
- Karan Patel
Collection: Funny
Image of Stephen Hawking
Life would be tragic if it weren't funny.
- Stephen Hawking
Collection: Funny
Image of Patrick J. Adams
I was fired from an NBC sitcom called 'Friends With Benefits.' I was wrong for the part from the beginning, didn't even want to audition, and kept thinking, 'This isn't funny at all.'
- Patrick J. Adams
Collection: Funny
Image of Jimi Hendrix
It's funny how most people love the dead, once you're dead, you're made for life.
- Jimi Hendrix
Collection: Funny
Image of Cazzie David
It's so funny how social media was just this fun thing, and now it's this monster that consumes so many millennial lives.
- Cazzie David
Collection: Funny
Image of Norm MacDonald
Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.
- Norm MacDonald
Collection: Funny
Image of Flip Wilson
Funny is an attitude.
- Flip Wilson
Collection: Funny
Image of Margaret Thatcher
It's a funny old world.
- Margaret Thatcher
Collection: Funny
Image of Gene Mauch
Losing streaks are funny. If you lose at the beginning you got off to a bad start. If you lose in the middle of the season, you're in a slump. If you lose at the end, you're choking.
- Gene Mauch
Collection: Funny
Image of Ricky Gervais
I don't care whether people say, ''The Office' is rubbish, 'Extras' is worse, 'Flanimals' is a waste of time. He's not funny; he never has been. I hate him.' I don't mind that at all. In fact, not only do I expect it, I celebrate it, because I think the haters are really important.
- Ricky Gervais
Collection: Funny
Image of Sylvia Plath
I looked on my stomach and saw Frieda Rebecca, white as flour with the cream that covers new babies, funny little dark squiggles of hair plastered over her head, with big, dark-blue eyes.
- Sylvia Plath
Collection: Funny
Image of Larry David
I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny.
- Larry David
Collection: Funny
Image of Bob Saget
Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored.
- Bob Saget
Collection: Funny
Image of Kanye West
It's funny because I've made a living off of words, but words get in the way of what you really want to say.
- Kanye West
Collection: Funny
Image of Rosie Perez
In my circle of friends, I've always been loud and funny and talkative. But as soon as I step out of that circle, I get very quiet and introspective. I don't want the spotlight on me.
- Rosie Perez
Collection: Funny
Image of Greg Boyle
I always have a funny story at communion time that underscores that no one is perfect, and that communion is not for perfect people but for hungry people.
- Greg Boyle
Collection: Funny
Image of George Orwell
Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.
- George Orwell
Collection: Funny
Image of Christian Kane
I owe my whole acting career to the fact that I'm a singer. I went out to Los Angeles and auditioned for a TV show called 'Fame L.A.' The original role was for a comedian, but they said I wasn't very funny, so they asked me, 'What else can you do?' So I played a singer.
- Christian Kane
Collection: Funny
Image of Stephen Hillenburg
I studied natural resources planning and thought I could get a job at some marine park. But I was great at art and so-so at marine biology. It's funny how the two eventually came together.
- Stephen Hillenburg
Collection: Funny
Image of Fred Willard
There's different kinds of improv. There's Second City improv where you try to slowly build a nice sketch. There's stuff you do in college coffee houses where you just go joke, joke, joke. Bring another funny character with a funny hat on his head. Christopher Guest is more the line of trying to get a story out.
- Fred Willard
Collection: Funny
Image of Christian Cage
With Edge and Christian, we were like 'Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure,' the Bill & Ted of WWE. We were kind of goofy, kind of funny, humorous, but then when we had to be serious in the ring, we would get serious.
- Christian Cage
Collection: Funny
Image of Billy Collins
There's something very authentic about humor, when you think about it. Anybody can pretend to be serious. But you can't pretend to be funny.
- Billy Collins
Collection: Funny
Image of Dominic Chianese
The anger that Uncle Junior has comes from my background. My father was the son of an Italian immigrant, and I've seen the fire of the Italian temperament. It can be explosive sometimes in ways that are both funny and tragic.
- Dominic Chianese
Collection: Funny
Image of Milos Forman
Memories are doing funny things to us.
- Milos Forman
Collection: Funny
Image of Lou Sanders
Mistakes can be funny. I drove a car into a bollard and it was pretty amusing because it was while I was showing off that I was a really good driver.
- Lou Sanders
Collection: Funny
Image of Edward Albee
The avant-garde theater is fun; it is free-swinging, bold, iconoclastic, and often wildly, wildly funny. If you will approach it with childlike innocence - putting your standard responses aside, for they do not apply - if you will approach it on its own terms, I think you will be in for a liberating surprise.
- Edward Albee
Collection: Funny
Image of Seth MacFarlane
We never really tried to shock for shock's sake on 'Family Guy'. If something was horribly offensive and shocking, we would put it in if it was also hysterically funny.
- Seth MacFarlane
Collection: Funny
Image of Bill Pullman
I want to be scary, boring, philosophical, funny, touching.
- Bill Pullman
Collection: Funny
Image of Miles Teller
When I was in high school, there was 'Superbad' and 'The Girl Next Door' and 'Wedding Crashers' and all these great movies. You hope to be a part of something that's smart, funny and in that Todd Phillips-vein. You want to make something like 'Superbad.' That movie was so good and so funny.
- Miles Teller
Collection: Funny
Image of Freddie Prinze
But the only comparison that I want to Lenny Bruce is that I'm funny. I'm Freddie Prinze, Puerto Rican all the way.
- Freddie Prinze
Collection: Funny
Image of Nate Dogg
The first song I wrote was called 'Baby Darling Darling Girl,' and you know what's funny? It went, 'Baby darling darling girl, I really love your Jheri Curl.' I thought it was tight as hell.
- Nate Dogg
Collection: Funny
Image of Rosie Jones
How could anyone like me for my true self? Being gay, disabled, loud and funny was too much in one 5ft person.
- Rosie Jones
Collection: Funny
Image of Diane Neal
I never get to be funny on T.V.
- Diane Neal
Collection: Funny
Image of Stone Cold Steve Austin
Man, I had a good time working on 'Grown Ups 2.' First of all, when I read the script, it is hands-down the funniest script I've ever read. It's laugh-out-loud funny.
- Stone Cold Steve Austin
Collection: Funny
Image of Rhys Darby
It's my mission to get the New Zealand accent into a Hollywood show. I'm proud of the way we talk, and I'm here to represent it. Kiwis are everywhere: they're in every city of the world. I've checked. We have a voice... it's a bit of a funny one at times, but it's one that I want to promote.
- Rhys Darby
Collection: Funny
Image of Simon Rich
At the end of the day I'm writing comedy. If you get too realistic as a comedy writer with your disasters, it stops being funny.
- Simon Rich
Collection: Funny
Image of Fred Schneider
There are a lot of funny motels. There was one motel in the middle of nowhere: it was real plain, but it had a gigantic green monster, something like the Creature from the Black Lagoon, standing next to this lake.
- Fred Schneider
Collection: Funny
Image of Angela Lansbury
'Blithe Spirit' is played almost all over Britain somewhere at all times because it is such a unique and ridiculously funny show. But it's also, in fact, under those layers of humor, a very serious show. It's quite misogynistic.
- Angela Lansbury
Collection: Funny
Image of Jason Momoa
I'm sure all actors have trouble. The guy who always plays the funny guy, he wants to be taken seriously. And there's the action guy who wants to do serious stuff. Everyone's grass is greener.
- Jason Momoa
Collection: Funny
Image of Sugar Ray Leonard
In Italy, I had an Afro, and a lot of the kids came up and felt my hair. It really was funny. I wish I had understood Italian.
- Sugar Ray Leonard
Collection: Funny
Image of Daniel Tosh
It's funny... you can make fun of AIDS or Haiti, but if you make fun of some starlet in Hollywood's looks? That's like the one thing... the line you are not to cross.
- Daniel Tosh
Collection: Funny
Image of Jarrett J. Krosoczka
What's funny is that an old Web site of mine just had one fake bio, and everyone went crazy for it. So when I made the new Web site, I thought, 'I just need to make this one even more absurd.'
- Jarrett J. Krosoczka
Collection: Funny
Image of Rush Limbaugh
You know how old I am? I'm so old, I remember when Letterman used to be funny and it was presidents who were serious. That's how old I am.
- Rush Limbaugh
Collection: Funny
Image of Issa Rae
I'll stick to finding the funny in the ordinary because my life is pretty ordinary and so are the lives of my friends - and my friends are hilarious.
- Issa Rae
Collection: Funny