Jennifer Crusie
Elvis!" Min shoved herself off the couch to shoo him away. "Stay away from there. There's broken glass." "He did that on purpose," David said, outraged. "Yes, David, the cat is plotting against you." Min fished the base out of the water and glass shards and put it on the table. Then she went to get her wastebasket and began to put the glass pieces in it.Collection: Cat
That furniture cost me a fortune! It's designer furniture." "Designed by whom ? Darth Vader ? The Hitler Youth ?Collection: Cost
Of course it hurt you neanderthal! See that? Thats blood. If theres blood, theres pain. Its like smoke and fire.Collection: Hurt
Real life doesn't have to suck.Collection: Real
You know who you remind me of? The kid cop in Lethal Weapon 3. You know, the one who says, 'it's my twenty-first birthday today', and right away you know he's dead meat?Collection: Kids
If you can look at somebody and say, 'I never loved you, you were a mistake,' that's one thing. But if you look at him and say, 'You were everything and I poisoned it because I wouldn't stand up for myself,' that's hard. That's too hard.Collection: Mistake
Really, The smart thing to do was to stop dating and get a cat.Collection: Smart
Every species has a dinner date as part of courting ritual. A woman who won't let you pay for dinner is rejecting your courtship. She may think she's playing fair, or that she's being a feminist, but a very deep level, she knows that she's crossing you off her list of possibilities.Collection: Thinking
My studies have shown that the process of falling into mature love happens in four steps. When you meet a woman, you subconsciously look for cues that she's the kind os person you should be with. That's assumption. If she passes the assumption test, you begin to get to know her to find out if she's appropriate for you. If she is, you're attracted. If, as you get to know her, the attraction is reinforced with joy or pain or both, you'll fall into infatuation. And if you manage to make a connection and attach to each other during infatuation, you'll move into mature, unconditional love.Collection: Pain
I'm talkin' about you. Stop pretending you're normal. You're insane. Make that work for you.Collection: Insane
In the bad old days, men kept women from choosing to work. In the bad new days, women keep women from choosing to stay home.Collection: Home
Drink to me! I just realized that I've slept with everyone at this table! ~NellCollection: Tables
A bar would not be a good career move for you.Collection: Moving
The last time I saw a brow that low I was watching slides in anthropology classCollection: Class
Your cat just got cat hair on me.” “It’s only fair,” Min said. “Your suit just got expensive suit lint on him.Collection: Cat
Wonder of wonders, the box had Elvis. Immediately the bar seemed a better place. She fed in coins and then punched the keys for "Hound Dog." Too bad Elvis had never recorded one called "Dickhead.Collection: Dog
As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.Collection: Men
If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning." -Gwen GoodnightCollection: Inspirational
This is making me crazy. I hate relying on other people to save me, I hate being clingy, I hate it, and every time you show up, I lean on you. - Matilda Scarlet Veronica Betty Vilma GoodnightCollection: Hate
Dead woman are not romantic,' Sophie said flatly. 'Okay, she's not dead,' Phin said. 'The bear ate her, and she came her brains out.Collection: Brain
Part of being a writer is defending your vision and not caving in to outside pressures.Collection: Vision
Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.Collection: Bible
That's a movie quote, right? You know, if you do that with books, people think you're intelligent." Sophie lowered her chin. "If this is your pathetic attempt to seduce me again, you're falling miserably." "I don't seduce woman." Phin shoved back his chair and stood up. "They fall into my open arms." "Clumsy of them.Collection: Book
Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.Collection: Hurt
Dempseys are never in trouble. We just have stretches of life that are more interesting than others.Collection: Interesting
Any instructions?” Carpenter said. “Yeah,” Shane said. “Shoot anybody who looks at Agnes funny. And anybody else you don’t like. I’m getting tired of this shi*.” “Somebody needs a hug,” Carpenter said. “Humor,” Shane said. “Har.Collection: Tired
It's not a problem. There are people out there with much worse problems than mine."-Cynthia "Doesn't make yours any more fun to bear."-Liza "No. But it does help with the self-pity."- CynthiaCollection: Fun
have you ever met a woman you wanted to give everything to? just turn over everything you had? -Davy Dempsey-Collection: Giving
Tomorrow we go back to normal?" "Sure," Mab said. "It'll be like none of this happened. Except I'll still be pregnant, and you'll still be making dragons, and Glenda will still be pretending that Dreamland is Cancun, and Weaver will still own the only green velvet demon in captivity. Other than that, perfectly normal." "I just meant no demons trying to kill us," Cindy said. "My baseline for normal is a lot lower than yours.Collection: Dragons
I like my afterglow with you in motion. I measure time by how your body sways.Collection: Body
You have to open up to the world and learn optimism...Contentment with the past, happiness with the present, and hope for the future. Learned optimisim.Collection: Past
He loved her all he could; but he couldn’t love her very much.Collection: Romance