Ashleigh Brilliant
All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power.Collection: Humorous
Some of my troubles are so familiar, I know them by their first names.Collection: Names
Why is the competition always so intense to set new records for maximum stupidity?Collection: Stupidity
Unless you move, the place where you are is the place where you will always be.Collection: Inspirational
There's only one thing more beautiful than a beautiful dream, and that's a beautiful reality.Collection: Beautiful
Most of my problems have no answer or else the answer is worse than the problem.Collection: Answers
Thanks to my computer, I have now achieved a much higher state of disorganization.Collection: Thanks
In a democracy, every little wrong idea may grow up to become national policy.Collection: Growing Up
The true artists is one who insists on producing a supply, whether or not there's any demand.Collection: Art
My success lies in having achieved a record numbers of failures.Collection: Lying
Should I abide by the rules until they're changed, or help speed the change by breaking them?Collection: Helping
It's sometimes easier to do the impossible than to do the embarrassing.Collection: Impossible
They laughed at Edison and Einstein, but somehow I still feel uncomfortable when they laugh at me.Collection: Laughing
Why does it so often take a genius to see the obvious?Collection: Doe
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.Collection: Sarcastic
The truly successful teacher is the one you will never need again.Collection: Teacher
Please don't lie to me,unless,you're sure I'll never find out the truth.Collection: Life
Sometimes the most urgent and vital thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest.Collection: Fitness
Do you believe in apathy at first sight?Collection: Believe
How can you call it unreasonable when all I want is my own way?Collection: Want
When you plan a journey from your mind into mine, remember to allow for the time difference.Collection: Journey
Somehow I reached excess without ever noticing when I was passing through satisfaction.Collection: Excess
If coffee didn't exist, somebody would have to invent it for me very soon.Collection: Coffee
I may not be perfect, but parts of me are excellent.Collection: May Not Be Perfect
Things are sometimes better left as they are, but you can't be sure until you change them.Collection: Sometimes
What we really need is to realize how little we really need.Collection: Simple
My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating.Collection: Humorous
Forgive me now - tomorrow I may no longer feel guilty.Collection: Funny
Life is too important to be taken as a joke, but too ridiculous to be taken seriously.Collection: Taken
I have no prejudices: all my irrational hatreds are based on solid evidence.Collection: Hatred
At great expense, we have built a vast system of inter-connecting stupidities.Collection: Stupidity
There's no harm in talking to yourself, but try to avoid telling yourself jokes you've heard before.Collection: Talking
What happened to you could have been worse - it could have happened to me.Collection: Happened
Communication with the dead is only a little more difficult than communication with some of the living.Collection: Communication
Unlike most other people, I'm just an average person.Collection: Average
There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know nothing about.Collection: Numbers
I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.Collection: Competition
The task I've been given seems absurd: To wait here on earth until I no longer exist.Collection: Waiting
I have many unrecognized talents, but my faults have somehow succeeded in securing wide recognition.Collection: Faults
My life has a superb cast, but I cannot figure out the plot.Collection: Inspirational
Sometimes the only way you can win is to stay out of the game.Collection: Winning
Before i knew the best part of my life had come ,it had gone.Collection: Gone
To be sure of winning, invent your own game, and never tell any other player the rules.Collection: Winning
I've found the secret of happiness, total disregard of everybody.Collection: Secret
Maybe I'm lucky to be going so slowly, because I may be going in the wrong directionCollection: Good Luck
Sooner or later, I'll be punctual.Collection: Sooner Or Later
The surest way to learn is by doing it, but often, the lesson is: Don't do it!Collection: Lessons
Not being able to do everything is no excuse for not doing everything you can.Collection: Inspirational
If you never try anything new, you'll miss many of the world's great disappointments.Collection: Disappointment