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Funny Life Quotes

Top Funny Life Quotes Collection

Discover a curated collection of Funny Life quotes. Find inspiration, motivation, and wisdom from the best quotes in this category.

Image of Darynda Jones
Paperwork wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for all the paper. And the work.
- Darynda Jones
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Mel Brooks
I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart...badoom, badoom, badoom.
- Mel Brooks
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Frank Zappa
The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else's life.
- Frank Zappa
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Peter De Vries
Life is a crowded superhighway with bewildering cloverleaf exits on which a man is liable to find himself speeding back in the direction he came.
- Peter De Vries
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Andy Borowitz
The hardest thing about life is that every now and then you have to do things so you have something to tweet about.
- Andy Borowitz
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Jim Steinman
If life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car. And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are.
- Jim Steinman
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Woody Paige
Life isn't a cabaret. It's a dive bar.
- Woody Paige
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Screamin' Jay Hawkins
I came into this world black, naked and ugly. And no matter how much I accumulate here, it's a short journey. I will go out of this world black, naked and ugly. So I enjoy life.
- Screamin' Jay Hawkins
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Paul Dickson
Airplane Law, The: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
- Paul Dickson
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Ashish Chauhan
When asked "If you could meet any famous person living or dead," I always ask whether the dead person would be alive again when I meet them.
- Ashish Chauhan
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Rex W. Tillerson
Just remember that a pat on the back is only 18 inches from a kick in the behind.
- Rex W. Tillerson
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Lauryn Hill
I consider myself a crayon... I may not be your favorite color but one day you'll need me to complete your picture.
- Lauryn Hill
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Douglas Horton
Born to be wild - live to outgrow it.
- Douglas Horton
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Arnold Schwarzenegger
If I can sell tickets to my movies like Red Sonja or Last Action Hero, you know I can sell just about anything.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Chetan Bhagat
The word “future” and females is a dangerous combination.
- Chetan Bhagat
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Friedrich Nietzsche
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Tom Robbins
There's birth, there's death, and in between there's maintenance.
- Tom Robbins
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Neil Simon
He's too nervous to kill himself. He wears his seat belt in a drive-in movie.
- Neil Simon
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Jill Shalvis
It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
- Jill Shalvis
Collection: Funny Life
Image of George Carlin
Life is a near-death experience.
- George Carlin
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Woody Allen
I didn't believe in reincarnation in my past life, and I still don't.
- Woody Allen
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Robert Breault
What you discover about life’s shell game is that it’s hardest to follow the pea when you’re the pea.
- Robert Breault
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Ziad K. Abdelnour
I tried to be normal once... worst two minutes of my life.
- Ziad K. Abdelnour
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Paulo Coelho
The gods throw the dice and they don't ask whether we want to be in the game or not.
- Paulo Coelho
Collection: Funny Life
Image of W. C. Fields
It's a funny old world. A man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
- W. C. Fields
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Jennifer Aniston
Life is funny. Life isn’t categorized into comedy, drama, action, is it?So I don’t know why they try to categorize everything. It drives me crazy-why it would have to be just a romantic comedy or…I want to have a little integrity, a little story, you know
- Jennifer Aniston
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Ralph Waldo Emerson
There is properly no history, only biography.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Gustave Flaubert
I am irritated by my own writing. I am like a violinist whose ear is true, but whose fingers refuse to reproduce precisely the sound he hears within.
- Gustave Flaubert
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Whoopi Goldberg
I don't like driving very much. That makes me very unhappy, because I scream a lot in the car, but other than that, life is actually pretty good.
- Whoopi Goldberg
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Laurell K. Hamilton
When in doubt, ignore and be horribly unimpressed
- Laurell K. Hamilton
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Margaret Atwood
These things sneak up on him for no reason, these flashes of irrational happiness. It's probably a vitamin deficiency.
- Margaret Atwood
Collection: Funny Life
Image of W. H. Auden
We are all here on earth to help others.
- W. H. Auden
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Maureen Johnson
It was almost funny. Life seemed downright accidental in its brevity, and death a punch line to a lousy joke.
- Maureen Johnson
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Sherrilyn Kenyon
I'm too young, too smart and too good-looking to die.
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Louis L'Amour
Adventure is nothing but a romantic name for trouble.
- Louis L'Amour
Collection: Funny Life
Image of Sophie Kinsella
Darling, when things go wrong in life, you lift your chin, put on a ravishing smile, mix yourself a little cocktail.
- Sophie Kinsella
Collection: Funny Life

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