Marshall B. Rosenberg
Enemy images are the main reason conflicts don't get resolved.Collection: Communication
If we ask two questions, we will see that punishment never works. First: What do we want the other person to do? Second: What do we want the other person's reasons to be for doing as we request?Collection: Communication
When people hear needs, it provokes compassion.Collection: Compassion
As NVC replaces our old patterns of defending, withdrawing or attacking in the face of judgment and criticism. We come to perceive ourselves and others, as well as our intentions and relationships, in a new light. Resistance, defensiveness, and violent reactions are minimized.Collection: Communication
If we want to make meetings productive, we need to keep track of those whose requests are on the table.Collection: Communication
Some people use NVC to respond compassionately to themselves, some to create greater depth in their personal relationships, and still others to build effective relationships at work or in the political arena. Worldwide, NVC is used to mediate disputes and conflicts at all levels.Collection: Communication
Empathy is a respectful understanding of what others are experiencing.Collection: Empathy
Violence in any form is a tragic expression of our unmet needs.Collection: Expression
Thinking based on who deserves what blocks compassionate communication.Collection: Block
In these long-standing conflicts, I find that most cases it gets resolved in about twenty minutes after each side can tell me the needs of the other.Collection: Communication
Every moment each human being is doing the best we know at that moment to meet our needs. We never do anything that is not in the service of a need, there is no conflict on our planet at the level of needs. We all have the same needs. The problem is in strategies for meeting the needs.Collection: Communication
Fear of corporal punishment obscures children's awareness of the compassion underlying the parent's demands.Collection: Children
Imagine connecting with the human spirit in each person in any situation at any time. Imagine interacting with others in a way that allows everyone's need to be equally valued. Imagine creating organizations and life-serving systems responsive to our needs and the needs of our environment.Collection: Organization
To practice the process of conflict resolution, we must completely abandon the goal of getting people to do what we want.Collection: Practice
Also, think about your intentionality - are you getting lost in the method? or coming from the intentionality, the purpose? You don't want to do the mechanics without the consciousness.Collection: Communication
Often, instead of offering empathy, we have a strong urge to give advice or reassurance and to explain our own position or feeling.Collection: Strong
An important aspect of self-compassion is to be able to empathically hold both parts of ourselves-the self that regrets a past action and the self that took the action in the first place.Collection: Regret
As soon as you say, "are you feeling X because I ..." Then the Jackal starts to salivate because he can educate the person that he's the cause of his pain.Collection: Pain
All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.Collection: Communication
Time and again, people transcend the paralyzing effects of psychological pain when they have sufficient contact with someone who can hear them empathically.Collection: Pain