Faina Ranevskaya
A fairytale is when you marry a frog and it turns out to be a princess. Reality is vice versa.Collection: Princess
Optimism is lack of information.Collection: Optimism
Aging is tedious, but it is the only way to live long.Collection: Long
Family can replace everything. So, before starting a family, one should think what's more important: family or everything.Collection: Thinking
Women are, of course, more intelligent. Have you ever heard of a woman that would lose her head only because a man has pretty legs?Collection: Intelligent
God created women beautiful - so that men can love them - and stupid - so that they can love men.Collection: Beautiful
Lesbians, homosexuals, masochism, sadism are not perversions. Actually, there are only two perversions: hockey on grass and ballet on ice.Collection: Hockey
If a patient wants to live, doctors are impotent.Collection: Doctors
When you get married, you'll understand what happiness is. But then it will be too late.Collection: Happiness
You cannot cure sclerosis, but you can forget it.Collection: Forget
A real man is one who remembers the lady's birthday, but never knows how old she is. A man who never remembers her birthday, but knows exactly how old she is, - is her husband.Collection: Husband
Success is the only unforgivable sin against your neighbor.Collection: Unforgivable Sin
Old age is the time when birthday candles cost more than the birthday cake itself, and half of your urine is wasted on medical testing.Collection: Cake
Health is when it hurts in a new place every day.Collection: Hurt
It has always been incomprehensible for me: people are ashamed of the poverty but aren't ashamed of the wealth.Collection: People
I had enough brain to live a stupid life.Collection: Stupid
My fortune is in the fact that I don't need it.Collection: Needs
I've been smart enough to have lived my life stupidly.Collection: Life
All my life I've swam in the loo butterfly style.Collection: Butterfly
It is a shame to confess but among all living creatures only man doesn't know what is useful for him.Collection: Men
Like all people in love, I was obnoxious and stupid, threatened suicide...And the one I was supposed to make worry only giggled.Collection: Suicide
Old age is when you are not bothered with bad dreams, but with bad reality.Collection: Dream
Spelling mistakes in a letter is like a bug on a white shirt.Collection: Mistake
Women critics are amazons in climax.Collection: Critics
On should life his life in such a way that even bastards remember him.Collection: Advice
It's not a face, but a personal insult.Collection: Faces
Beauty is a horrible power.Collection: Horrible