Charles Horton Cooley

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If love closes, the self contracts and hardens: the mind having nothing else to occupy its attention and give it that change and renewal it requires, busies itself more and more with self-feeling, which takes on narrow and disgusting forms, like avarice, arrogance and fatuity.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Self
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Prudence and compromise are necessary means, but every man should have an impudent end which he will not compromise.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Mean
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To persuade is more trouble than to dominate, and the powerful seldom take this trouble if they can avoid it.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Powerful
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Freedom is the opportunity for right development, for development in accordance with the progressive ideal of life that we have in conscience.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Opportunity
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The more developed sexual passion, in both sexes, is very largely an emotion of power, domination, or appropriation. There is no state of feeling that says mine, mine, more fiercely.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Sex
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Faith in our associates is part of our faith in God.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Faith In God
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Since freedom is not a fixed thing that can be grasped and held once for all, but a growth, any particular society, such as our own, always appears partly free and partly unfree. In so far as it favors, in every child, the development of his highest possibilities, it is free, but where it falls short of this it is not.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Children
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When one ceases from conflict, whether because he has won, because he has lost, or because he cares no more for the game, the virtue passes out of him.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Games
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So far as discipline is concerned, freedom means not its absence but the use of higher and more rational forms as contrasted with those that are lower or less rational. A free discipline controls the individual by appealing to his reason and conscience, and therefore to his self-respect; while an unfree control works upon some lower phase of the mind, and so tends to degrade him. It is freedom to be disciplined in as rational a manner as you are fit for.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Mean
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The idea of freedom is quite in accord with a general, though vague, sentiment among us; it is an idea of fair play, of giving everyone a chance; and nothing arouses more general and active indignation among our people than the belief that some one or some class is not getting a fair chance.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Class
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A man may lack everything but tact and conviction and still be a forcible speaker; but without these nothing will avail... Fluency, grace, logical order, and the like, are merely the decorative surface of oratory.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Men
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I is a militant social tendency, working to hold and enlarge its place in the general current of tendencies. So far as it can it waxes, as all life does. To think of it as apart from society is a palpable absurdity of which no one could be guilty who really saw it as a fact of life.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Thinking
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The passion of self-aggrandizement is persistent but plastic; it will never disappear from a vigorous mind, but may become morally higher by attaching itself to a larger conception of what constitutes the self.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Passion
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To desire to be an artist is to desire to be a complete man in respect to some one function, to realize yourself utterly. A man is a poor thing who is content not to be an artist.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Artist
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It happens from time to time in every complex and active society, that certain persons feel the complexity and insistence as a tangle, and seek freedom in retirement, as Thoreau sought at Walden Pond. They do not, however, in this manner escape from the social institutions of their time, nor do they really mean to do so; what they gain, if they are successful, is a saner relation to them.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Retirement
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A strange and somewhat impassive physiognomy is often, perhaps, an advantage to an orator, or leader of any sort, because it helps to fix the eye and fascinate the mind.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Eye
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The most effective way of utilizing human energy is through an organized rivalry, which by specialization and social control is, at the same time, organized co-operation.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Way
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The need to exert power, when thwarted in the open fields of life, is the more likely to assert itself in trifles.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Life
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The bashful are always aggressive at heart.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Heart
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There is nothing less to our credit than our neglect of the foreigner and his children, unless it be the arrogance most of us betray when we set out to "Americanize" him.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Children
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If the man succeeds in becoming indifferent to the opinions of his neighbors he runs into another danger, that of a distorted and extravagant self of the pride sort, since by the very process of gaining independence and immunity from the stings of depreciation and misunderstanding, he has perhaps lost that wholesome deference to some social tribunal that a man cannot dispense with and remain quite sane.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Running
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The chief misery of the decline of the faculties, and a main cause of the irritability that often goes with it, is evidently the isolation, the lack of customary appreciation and influence, which only the rarest tact and thoughtfulness on the part of others can alleviate.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Appreciation
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When one has come to accept a certain course as duty he has a pleasant sense of relief and of lifted responsibility, even if the course involves pain and renunciation. It is like obedience to some external authority; any clear way, though it lead to death, is mentally preferable to the tangle of uncertainty.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Pain
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Could anything be more indicative of a slight but general insanity than the aspect of the crowd on the streets of Chicago?
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Insanity
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To retire to the monastery, or the woods, or the sea, is to escape from the sharp suggestions that spur on ambition.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Ambition
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A person of mature years and ripe development, who is expecting nothing from literature but the corroboration and renewal of past ideas, may find satisfaction in a lucidity so complete as to occasion no imaginative excitement, but young and ambitious students are not content with it. They seek the excitement because they are capable of the growth that it accompanies.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Book
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When we hate a person, with an intimate, imaginative, human hatred, we enter into his mind, or sympathize – any strong interest will arouse the imagination and create some sort of sympathy.
- Charles Horton Cooley
Collection: Strong