Eric Nicol

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Very little is known about the War of 1812 because the Americans lost it.
- Eric Nicol
Collection: War
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Most Americans don't understand Canadian political parties. Neither do most Canadians
- Eric Nicol
Collection: Party
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Clearly, if Confederation is to survive another 100 years, Canada must find a national esprit de corps. Cohesion cannot depend indefinitely on hating Toronto.
- Eric Nicol
Collection: Hate
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The first humans to come to Canada were the Indians. There is some mystery as to where the Indians came from. Some experts say that they came from the same place as the Eskimo. This doesn't help much because nobody knows where the Eskimo came from either. (Except the Eskimo, and they aren't talking.)
- Eric Nicol
Collection: Talking
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The fashionable Canadian drug habit, instead of cocaine, is to sniff real snow.
- Eric Nicol
Collection: Real
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If the rest of his foursome are bunched directly behind his ball, or assume the foetal position with their backs to the tee, the golfer is reminded that his drive tends to be erratic. More cruel yet is for his opponent to stand directly in the projected line of flight, as the safest place to be.
- Eric Nicol
Collection: Golf