Bob Uecker
When I came up to bat with three men on and two outs in the ninth, I looked in the other team's dugout and they were already in street clothes.Collection: Men
I set records that will never be equaled. In fact, I hope 90% of them don't even get printed.Collection: Hope
I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it's never at the expense of the other guy.Collection: Humor
I signed a very modest $3,000 bonus with the Braves in Milwaukee. And my old man didn't have that kinda money to put out.Collection: Money
I hope the fans have enjoyed listening as much as I've enjoyed doing the games. I don't ever go to the park where I don't have a good day. I don't like losing. But I don't think I ever go to the park where I have a bad day. I don't think once.Collection: Hope
I had a great shoe contract and glove contract with a company who paid me a lot of money never to be seen using their stuff.Collection: Money
Phil Niekro and his brother were pitching against each other in Atlanta. Their parents were sitting right behind home plate. I saw their folks more that day than they did the whole weekend.Collection: Home
The biggest thrill a ballplayer can have is when your son takes after you. That happened when my Bobby was in his championship Little League game. He really showed me something. Struck out three times. Made an error that lost the game. Parents were throwing things at our car and swearing at us as we drove off. Gosh, I was proud.Collection: Car
The way to catch a knuckleball is to wait until it stops rolling and then pick it up.
On TV the people can see it. On radio you've got to create it.
I knew when my career was over. In 1965 my baseball card came out with no picture.
You know, I was once named Minor League Player of the Year... unfortunately, I had been in the majors for two years at the time.
Career highlights? I had two - I got an intentional walk from Sandy Koufax and I got out of a rundown against the Mets.
Before broadcasting for 50-some years, I did TV, played 10 years in the big leagues, won a world championship - and played a big part in that, too, letting the Cardinals inject me with hepatitis. Takes a big man to do that.
Hey, I think it's easy for guys to hit .300 and stay in the big leagues. Hit .200 and try to stick around as long as I did; I think it's a much greater accomplishment. That's hard.
In 1962 I was named Minor League Player of the Year. It was my second season in the bigs.
Baseball hasn't forgotten me. I go to a lot of old-timers games and I haven't lost a thing. I sit in the bullpen and let people throw things at me. Just like old times.
Let's face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can't resist.
I hit a grand slam off Ron Herbel and when his manager Herman Franks came out to get him, he was bringing Herbel's suitcase.
I just grew the hair on my back. Facial hair just wasn't appealing to me. I liked it on my back, though.
How do you catch a knuckleball? You wait until it stops rolling, then go pick it up.
When I looked at the third base coach, he turned his back on me.
Sporting goods companies pay me not to endorse their products.
Sure, women sportswriters look when they're in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word?
Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat.
People have asked me a lot of times, because I didn't hit a lot, how long a dozen bats would last me. Depending on the weight and model I was using at that time - I would say eight to 10 cookouts.
I used to soak my mitts in a bucket of water for about two days. Then I'd put a couple of baseballs in the pocket and wrap it up with a rubber band. Today you don't have to do that, because catchers' mitts are more like first baseman's gloves.
I was acting when I was playing baseball.
I had slumps that lasted into the winter.
I had been playing for a while, and I asked Louisville Slugger to send me a dozen flame treated bats. But when I got it, I realized they had sent me a box of ashes.
We were on for six years. We were in syndication for a while. It had its run. I still see the people from 'Mr. Belvedere,' too. We stay in touch.
I spent three of the best years of my life in 10th grade.
Not bragging by any means, but I could have done a lot of other stuff as far as working in films go and working in television... I had chances to do that stuff, but I like baseball, I really do.
I think my top salary was maybe in 1966. I made $17,000 and 11 of that came from selling other players' equipment.
Where would I be without baseball? Who am I without baseball?
I didn't get a lot of awards as a player. But they did have a Bob Uecker Day Off for me once in Philly.
I did stand-up, weird and ignorant stuff about my career - anything for a laugh.
Any teammate of mine that had a kid and a boy that was capable of playing baseball, I think I set a terrific example of 'Don't do this' and 'Don't do that.' And that's one of the things that I'm most proud of.
You throw batting practice, you warm up pitchers, you sit and cheer. You do whatever you have to do to stay on the team.
If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
After getting out of the service and going into baseball I never wanted to do anything else.
I remember one time I'm batting against the Dodgers in Milwaukee. They lead, 2 - 1, it's the bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, two out and the pitcher has a full count on me. I look over to the Dodger dugout and they're all in street clothes.Collection: Two
They broke it to me gently. The manager came up to me before a game and told me they didn't allow visitors in the clubhouse.Collection: Baseball
Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. To last as long as I did with the skills I had, with the numbers I produced, was a triumph of the human spirit.Collection: Play
The highlight of my baseball career came in Philadelphia's Connie Mack Stadium when I saw a fan fall out of the upper deck. When he got up and walked away, the crowd booed.Collection: Baseball
People don't know this, but I helped the Cardinals win the pennant. I came down with hepatitis. The trainer injected me with it!Collection: Baseball
I led the league in go get 'em next time.Collection: Baseball
Between me and my roommate, we've hit 400 Major League home runs.Collection: Running
You know, I was once named Minor League Player of the Year...unfortunately, I had been in the majors for two years at the time.Collection: Player
When I played baseball I got death threats all the time--from my mother.Collection: Baseball