William Archibald Spooner

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The Lord is a shoving leopard.
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Leopards
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I remember your name perfectly, but I just can't think of your face.
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Thinking
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Sir, you have tasted two whole worms; you have hissed all my mystery lectures and been caught fighting a liar in the quad; you will leave by the next town drain.
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Liars
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Tell me, was it you or your brother who was killed in the war?
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Funny
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In the sermon I have just preached, whenever I said Aristotle, I meant St. Paul.
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Said
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The weight of rages will press hard upon the employer
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Weight
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Poor soul - very sad; her late husband, you know, a very sad death - eaten by missionaries - poor soul.
- William Archibald Spooner
Collection: Funny