These are strange times. I'm 37 and this is the weirdest the world's ever felt. There's a right-wing, nationalistic anger sweeping through Europe and America.Collection: Anger
Los Angeles feels empty and overrated. I struggle with it as a holiday destination. It's the sort of place where you need to know some locals, otherwise it just feels so empty.
I'm a very early riser on holiday. I am invariably down at the pool on a sun lounger even before anyone can put a towel on one.
At a gig in Liverpool I had this lady give me 21 cup cakes she had made herself. It's not really rock'n'roll is it? Tom Jones gets pants thrown at him and I get given fairy cakes.
I do cryotherapy, which is where you're in minus 70 and you have three minutes of deep freeze and your body thinks it's dying so it produces loads of blood cells and then you're fine - apparently.
Like most comedians, I have crippling low self-esteem, so I always think that what I've just done is rubbish.
I broke my wrist on TV trying to do a one-armed push-up. A lot of people delight in pointing this out to me.
I think you just have to be comfortable in your own skin, and when I do stand-up or the show I'm in a really good mood.
I'm not the kind of comic who would try stuff on Twitter, because I have to work up ideas and I can only do that in front of people.
I've been doing stand-up for 15 years and I've never even been invited to the Comedy Awards! How mental is that?
Mumbai was magical, which I was really surprised by, and I got an insight into the world of Bollywood while hanging out with some Bollywood film stars while there.
If you want any attention in the Howard household, you have to shout quite loudly and try to develop a personality.
I think all our leaders are utterly beneath us. You just watch 'Prime Minister's Questions' and go: 'How is this the best that we've got?'
I find it really weird, when I'm shopping in Tesco, the amount of times I have people like: 'What you doing in here? You're famous!'
I buy a lot of Liverpool trinkets. I've got Philippe Coutinho's boot - I spent three grand on that. Which, you know, is insane. But it's Philippe Coutinho's boot, what you gonna do?
I bought my mum a car, and I bought my brother one of those hoverboards for Christmas, and I bought my family a holiday to Australia.
I'd been writing jokes since I was 16, not very good ones though, but I was always trying to make my mates laugh.
The Edinburgh Fringe is a tough beast and you do whatever you can to get through it. But it's really the worst place to see comedians; everyone is so tense and nervous because it feels like Ofsted inspectors are out there.
Sometimes improv doesn't work on TV because the audience had heard the thing that was shouted and they're very much alive, the audience in the room - they're alive in that moment. Whereas the audience sat at home on the sofa, it feels like it's part of a party that they haven't been invited to.
It's just a joy travelling with your job. You get to wander around these interesting cities and then things happen or you observe things and you go on stage at the end of the night and chat about it.
I wanna be incidental characters in 'Only Fools and Horses,' that would have been good. I wouldn't mind playing Trigger, Trigger would have been good.
There's a lot of brilliant comics who are amazing, but you can see them doing the same 20 minutes that they were doing five years ago, verbatim. I think that doesn't lend itself to progressing.
I don't want to be one of those comics who says, 'Hey, what's wrong with air travel?' and stuff like that.
Audiences around the world are all pretty similar. People just rock up and want to have a laugh, although Americans whoop more than English crowds.
Because I don't wear a suit, and have such a horrible boy band face, people assume that I'm not doing satirical material.
The last thing you want to do is preach to the converted. What you want to do is talk about issues from a non-political point of view, from a human point of view.
I don't want to do a rabidly left-wing show. I think it's much more interesting to turn the knife on yourself.
If you're doing 70 gigs in a tour, there's a lot of responsibility. People need a big night out, and you're providing it.