Jake Johannsen
A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. 'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have kill you too.Collection: Funny
If love was easy, there would be almost no music.Collection: Would Be
People honk at you if you meditate at the stop light.Collection: Light
Never put a razor inside your nose - even as a joke.Collection: Advice
Yes. I didn't think there were any witnesses, so I guess I'll have to kill you too.Collection: Food