I love going to weddings. I love movie scenes of weddings. Even, like, TV-show weddings - I cry at every wedding.Collection: Wedding
I've played Frankie Cosmos shows where the promoter or whoever sees that I'm the lead singer, and then they go up to David, the bassist, and are like, 'So, do we pay you?' And he's like, 'No, you pay her; she's the boss.' Those are moments where I'm just like, 'I'm clearly in charge.'
I knew that 'Next Thing' was an angry album while I was making it. But I thought that it was angry the way that you get in a fight, not angry as a huge life change.
If I could have a record that represents every stage of my life, I'd be putting out one a month. Everything is always changing, and so is the way that I feel about stuff.
It's funny: 'Next Thing' was written in a time of my life when I was actually really naive and thought that I was wise.
The first music-learning thing that I took seriously was piano lessons when I was a kid. I guess that was probably the only time that I was forced to perform music, because I had piano recitals, and my school also had mandatory music classes that had some performing required.
Performing is something that has really grown on me and become an important part of my life, which I didn't used to feel. I didn't used to want to really perform live a lot. It's been an interesting adjustment.
Sometimes I'll write something that's purely autobiographical, and sometimes pure fiction, and sometimes a mix.
The thing is, I feel like it would defeat the purpose of being a musician if I let any kind of fear of failure affect my songwriting or making an album or whatever.
I really liked punk music and experimental music that my brother was taking me to go see in the city, when I was probably, like, 13 years old. I was seeing a lot of teenagers making 'weird' music, and I think that was probably a big part of the reason that I actually started to play myself.
It was a really long process, dropping out of college. I was there for a semester, then I would take a semester off and go on tour, then I would go back for a semester.
I'm always the one sitting at the merch table and talking to everyone at the show - and I think it's because I have this deep fear that if I'm not approachable or I'm not there, people are going to think I'm a brat.
I definitely think that touring is a really crazy lifestyle and makes it hard to live a normal life and have relationships and friendships.
What I really care about is writing... Some people feel about touring the way I feel about writing, which is, 'Whoa, I can't believe I get to do this as a job.'
I was seeing kids my age playing shows at their parents' houses or the couple of all-ages venues that existed. I feel like I saw so many different kinds of music that I wouldn't have discovered on my own.
My brother was 13 when people started telling me that he was a 'hipster.' I was 11 and thought it was so stressful, like, 'How do you not be called that?'
My parents listened to a lot of James Taylor and Hall and Oates. My mom and I used to listen to Liz Phair and Indigo Girls a lot in the car, too.
You meet a lot of people in New York who are different than you and have different stories, so I see everyone as super individual. I feel like I can be infinitely inspired because New York is huge.
I realized I was trained my whole life to be an accommodating person, to make sure that everybody is comfortable before I'm comfortable. After giving so much of myself to strangers, I learned to care for myself a little more, especially on tour.
I don't actually have problems dealing with corporate situations. There are times I've railed against it, but there are other times when I'm like, 'I'll take your money, no problem.'
I can be very social, but often, it weighs down on me later that the social thing was a put-on. I feel like my way of dealing with not wanting to go out is, I just don't. I can't bring myself to.
I kind of like the idea of creating my own literature within my albums. I definitely thought about that when I started writing songs.
If I had to pick an artist that I look up to and am inspired by, it's Matisse because of how many times he would paint the same idea until he felt like he maybe got it right, and I try to do the same thing with my writing.
I think part of the process of putting out a record is always looking back because, by the time a song comes out, it's been a year since you wrote it.
Once you're in a position where you can choose to not be around toxic environments, just do that as much as you can.
It's good for people to be able to see an archive of an artist learning how to write and getting better, especially for teenagers who are starting to write: to see that I started out making pretty easy and weird and bad-sounding music and that you can teach yourself how to write over a long period of time.
My parents have both done some music stuff. My family was very artist-friendly, so that was encouraging.
Those emotions that are really strong, the ones that inspire a song, you can hold onto that. You can let it marinate for years and keep writing about it even better than you did then.
It's even easier to write about the past now that I'm happy and have better stuff to write about. That's why someone like Bob Dylan can make so many records over so long a time; it's not like he's been sad all this time. He's really successful!
I go through phases sometimes: 'I'm a genius; they get me,' and sometimes I'm like, 'Why does anyone want to hear me?'
The way my body is viewed in the world is different than a male body. People are going to write about the performance, but they're probably also going to be writing about what I was wearing or my hair, which just doesn't happen to men.
I try to not assume things are sexism. I'm trying to be good natured about why things are happening.
I don't even know how people managed without the Internet years ago. Having to mail a cassette tape of your music to strangers over the course of months... I just can't imagine having to do that.
When I was 18, I borrowed my parents' car, and they are super supportive. They might give us snacks for the road, but it's not like they are paying clubs to book us.
I feel like I can't write something that has a real emotion in it if I can't connect to that emotion.
There've been times on tour when people have said to us, 'Yeah, your band is really simple.' But it's really not.
I've definitely gotten to the point where we get to the venue, and people know that I'm in charge of the band.
I played my first show when I was 17, and that was a big moment. I realized it was something I could keep doing.