Dat Phan
I was living under a desk in West Hollywood. It was a closet that I shared with another comic. I was shocked when they called me to come in to try out for the show. The chances of me getting on a TV show and winning it is like one-in-a-million. I had only been doing comedy for six years at that point, so I was basically considered an open mic-er or maybe a feature act once in awhile.Collection: Winning
Money comes and goes. I'm thankful I have money. I'm trying to save up more. I would like more money. But it's not happiness. If you're a millionaire and hate your family, hate your friends and your life, then what is the point? You're just a person with a lot of money and power who is not happy.Collection: Happiness
I learned that money's not happiness. The more famous I am and the more money I make, the closer I stay to my family and friends that I've known since junior high school. True happiness to me is the connection with fellow human beings I've known for a long time.Collection: Happiness
Us Asians look like we're twenty until we're fifty. Once we're fifty, we look like Yoda.Collection: Twenties
When you grow up poor, you have to either work really hard to try and get where you want to be, or you'll just stay put.Collection: Growing Up
It's a constant battle between what your heart tells you, and what your brain tells you.Collection: Heart
And I come from a small Vietnamese family. We're really close too, all ten of us.Collection: Family
I knew comedy was the thing for me when I was the only Asian kid in high school... who failed math.Collection: Funny
We want to be seen as more than just martial artists, or bad stereotype token roles in American TV and movies.Collection: Artist
I was doing gigs to stay alive. I worked two or three jobs at a time, there were times when I stayed up for 36 hours straight. I slept in shopping mall parking lots. A stand-up gig paid $35; then I could eat for another few days until the next gig. Literally, I was performing to live.Collection: Jobs
I did whatever it takes to do stand-up. There is an abundance of material in struggling and poverty and trying to make it. There is so much humor in that, it's unlimited.Collection: Struggle
Vietnam, we take over by doing pedicure! That's how we take over. We take over one foot at a time, damn it - that's the plan of attack right there. We take over from the toe up, that's the plan. We spread over USA like fungus from the toe.Collection: Usa